Monday, March 21, 2011

Regret Free Parenting By: Catherine Hickem, LCSW


I am excited to talk about this book! I was a single mom of 2 until I met my fiancée, the best man in the world Ken. My daughter was 3 months old when we met, but my son was 3. Both of my children have different fathers, who are not in their lives, so Mom here, had to be mom and dad. Which, I always thought was fine, I'm not your average girl, I love to go hunting and fishing, muddin' on the 4-wheelers, dirt bike riding, exploring in the woods, playing BASEBALL (I played for 7 years in high school, and no NOT softball!). I can shoot hoops, play football, build mud castles, catch frogs, climb trees, the whole lot of it. But as my son got a little bigger, it was apparent that I just couldn't be dad also... No matter how hard I tried, there is a difference.

This book is about mothering, and does put the fathers kinda on the back burner as followers, but I know in my house now, it does not work that way. I met this wonderful man, who had no children of his own, and he stepped up and became "DAD"! The things I did with the kids, trying to get the male involvement just wasn't enough, because, ummm...I am not a male, lol.

The whole problem, that I have is the regrets in my parenting. How could I have changed things, why can't I do better for them, am I doing things right? It is so hard to tell when you are in a position as mine. Also, both of my children are special needs children. The book did mention briefly about special needs children, and kudos for remembering those of us who have these wonderful special children!

Ms. Hickem's writing is not that of an educated person trying to make you feel stupid, but she is almost talking to you as your friend, giving some advice. The book focuses more on the parent than the child, which is how a book like this should be. Yes, our children are important, but they essentially model us, so help me help them, get my point? This book was so easy to read, and I didn't want to put it down. I have so much regret built up in me, between custody fights, just plain arguments, domestic violence...you name it I have been there. I do, however, shield my children from all that negativity. I keep them away from the conflict as much as possible. But, the regret that it even had to happen at all is stuck with me forever. This book teaches you to let it go.

This book would be great for new parents, as starting out Ms. Hickem states : "being an intentional mom and a regret-free parent means you spend good time being intentional about yourself, your role as a mom, and your understanding of yourself." I wish I would have had this book for the last 6 years! I recommend it to all moms and even single dad's although it is more geared toward MOTHERING...fathers could learn some of these techniques also. In closing, I will be recommending this book to a lot of my friends!

**Disclaimer: I received a copy of Regret Free Parenting By: Catherine Hickem, LCSW from Booksneeze.com for review. I have given my honest opinion about this book. No other compensation was received.

1 comment:

Catherine Hickem said...

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review "Regret Free Parenting". I'm humbled that it spoke to you and I hope it will continue to speak to your family as you continue your parenting journey. Looking forward to helping you to help raise your kids!


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